Christmas Refelction
by K a t r i x a
Summary: Kanda contemplates the holidays while a certain bean sprout bugs his thoughts. Poor Kanda he can't just ever seem to admit his feelings can he?


**Author's Note: **Merry Christmas!! Kanda x Allen! Enjoy! Also to avoid being flamed the anime does not say what religion each character follows but to me Kanda seems like a person who despite his outward appearance and mannerism is a Buddhist and follows those ideals as well as the way of the Samurai. So there. I disrespect no religion so please do not get all up in arms.

**Disclaimer: **On the first day of Christmas my true love gave to me…nothing. I own nothing damn it why do you have to tease me!! Gosh!

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Christmas. It was a holiday Kanda despised with his entire being after all why should he let himself relax? They could be under attack any moment and yet here they all were cavorting like fucking idiots on crack (though he often did not find this far from the truth). However he could probably think of one reason to like this holiday: Snow. Kanda loved snow its purity, its calmness the silence that falls in the night as snow blankets the earth like an ocean of diamonds. The brisk air and the soothing sounds of the night. The way the sun peeked through the clouds which floated lazily in the bright clear blue sky…the smile of Allen when he was asleep…

Wait did he just think of Allen? That stupid bean sprout? Yes though he hated to admit the annoying bugger had wormed his way into his life and for the life of him he could not help but feel his heart pound every time the white haired exorcist was near him. How many times did he dream of running his fingers through his hair or comfort him when the fight was done? It was dangerous how easy this boy-man broke through his walls and that alone made him more cold. He could not let another in. No not at all. The joyous sounds of his comrads in the mess hall singing and laughing and talking served to annoy him. How was he to block out the stupid bean sprout and observe the beauty of the winter holiday?

Of course he could lock himself up in his room and meditate but knowing his luck someone would come fetch him and despite his death threats he would ultimately fail and join them but he would not enjoy himself no thank you! And though he knew of this outcome he went to his room anyway only to have what he knew was going to happen, happen. So now he was busy being by himself in a corner away from everyone. Except of course it had to be the corner where a mistletoe was hung conspicuously. This only served to annoy him but when he looked to his left he was surprised to see Allen there, eyes all soft and warm filled with a gentle kindness one would have lost in this war.

"What do you want bean sprout?" He asked, trying to keep the thoughts from resurfacing. Fucking Allen and his damnable selflessness! Him and his bravery his strength….his ability to bounce back from any situation…

Kanda Yuu envied the said man before him and so though he was treated coldly still found himself confident enough to know that he, Kanda, would only allow him in. He knew this and Kanda knew this but that did not mean he would let the brat in. No he would become his weakness and Kanda did not like to be weak. However even though he says this to himself he cannot help but feel weak every time they fight and the level four damn near had killed Allen…

"Why don't you like Christmas Kanda?" He asked curiously. Kanda could come up with many reasons: It was annoying, people acted like debases, there was to much bloody god damn cheer in the air and he often felt people were to fanatical in celebrating the birth of Jesus.

Yes they may work for the Vatican protecting the innocence but he was not fond of seeing people so fanatical. He was not in himself a Christian more of a follower of the Buddhist ways yet he respected this religion and this holiday as a sign of good faith for he did not wish for Karma to bite him in the ass.

"I don't hate Christmas I hate the annoying cheerfulness people spread. We could be attacked any minute and they are acting as if there are no cares. Also it's a worthless holiday." He said in a deadpanned voice.

"Is that the only reason?"

"Yes."

Kanda took this time to observe Allen the hurt swimming in his eyes at the bluntness killed him just a bit, fucking Allen making him bloody fucking feel…

"You know Kanda, Christmas is also about love and spreading kindess to each other." Just what was Allen getting at? "So, Merry Christmas Kanda"

A simple peck on the cheek but no less a kiss. Kanda stood shocked, rooted to the spot as a blush tinged his cheeks.

"W-what the hell?"

Allen must have found his situation funny because he started to laugh, a laugh which sounded musical to his ears. Damn it there he goes again. Honestly he wished those thoughts would stop intruding.

"Mistletoe Kanda." He said grinning. Kanda cursed loudly before stalking out, not seeing the gentle smile thrown at at his retreating form. Inside he couldn't help but smile.

"Stupid bean sprout…" Perhaps Christmas wasn't that bad after all.

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**Author's Note: **Like? Hate? Review and tell me what you think!


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